Posts that are narrative + reflective
In 2020, I underwent surgery to remove 20% of my right lung after being diagnosed with carcinoma in situ. Looking back, I found myself exploring my experience through Western medicine, Traditional Chinese Medicine and BaZi; not to search for one explanation, but to understand what each perspective could genuinely teach me about health, healing and the limits of certainty.
For a long time, I believed wisdom was mostly about knowing when to establish boundaries. My wedding reminded me that wisdom also requires us to recognise when new evidence deserves a new conclusion, while remaining faithful to the values and boundaries that protected us in the first place.
I thought my wedding would teach me something about marriage. Instead, it taught me something about friendship, community, and how easily we inherit other people’s fears without realising it.
Weddings are often framed as the beginning of a life. At 38, mine feels more like a milestone within a life that is already well underway. This is a reflection on wedding planning, mental bandwidth, and the surprising realisation that what I’m most looking forward to is having my time and attention back.
As my wedding approaches, I find myself feeling something quieter than excitement. After witnessing enough grand weddings and enough marriages that did not last, I’ve come to realise that a wedding is very good at performing permanence. Marriage itself is built elsewhere, in ordinary days, difficult conversations, and the steady choice to keep showing up for each other.
A personal reflection on stage 0 lung cancer, thoracic surgery recovery, early detection, insurance, and the life lessons that changed everything.
